Tuesday, January 6, 2009

A year of lustful quality

I felt a review of the journey this site has made over the year might be a good start to a new year. As much as for my readers as myself. I sometimes forget what i've published to the anonymizing ether, and it reminds me of some of the wisdoms (which are rare) and the stubborn bluntness (which are more frequent) i've put my byline to.

In January, after nearly a full year of posts under my belt, i could feel an ennui kicking in about my captaincy over these pages. It was the first time i contemplated ending my online journal. Rather than do that, i decided that what i needed was a personal challenge. I tasked myself with writing several postsseries of posts regarding the physical senses. Each one would either describe how the sense allows me to communicate with the world, or i use the sense to detail a scene. My personal favorite of the series is the one i did on sight.

By February, i'd regained my wind for the site, and attempted a few posts in the hopes of helping others recreate some of the moments they read about here. I attempted to answer the question "Do dominants actually like to hurt their submissive?" here. I really hit a new stride that i enjoyed when i started to regale the story of keeping my girl in suspense with my friend K and his girl as participants. This series meant a lot to me because it contained a good amount of mystery but also allowed me to show some of my own vulnerability, which is a color on the dominant's pallet used far too infrequently.

I started out March rather unlamb-like, attempting to tackle the supposed "Venus corset". I'm still not satisfied with the response it received, only because it is the post that has attracted the second most visitors, but still no clarity on whether it exists or not. I embarked on a new series (what am i, my own network?) where i place a "note" or a "message" before a girl that details to her what i'd like her to do. I've enjoyed this series, if not just to have to come up with interesting titles using the word "demands".

By April, i could see the long awaited crest of the holiday my girl and i were going to embark on by month's end. That affected the manner in which i composed my posts, and the promise of extended rest and tranquility are what i attribute the mood of two of my all-time favorite posts. The idea for a post that started with the ending came to me one day when i was mailing a letter. I love the image of a girl dropping a letter into a postal box, anxious, reluctant but also incredibly aroused (i've also always had a thing for chastity belts). The second, and perhaps my favorite of the two, touches on my need to weave spirituality throughout my power exchange (it is in fact nothing without the spiritual).

And then...i departed...

It would be three weeks later before i posted again. I almost didn't post at all. When i returned from my "vanishing", there were many times i contemplated the complete deletion of TransformHer, even had the screen up with my mouse's cursor hovering over the button. The posts over the next few months took on a retrospective tone as i attempted to waylay time to figure out if i wanted to continue. Poems, essays and exhibitions mainly made up these entries.

It wasn't until i decided to chronicle my regular Friday correction of my girl did my passion for the site re-emerge.

I received the ultimate honor in August when my girl offered her own words in reflection on being mummified. Exploring one of my biggest priorities - dispelling rumors and myths that exist about a real life power exchange - i revealed how clumsy and imperfect the exchange between my girl and i can be, but i also questioned the need for all the kinky accoutrement.

Continuing on this theme, September brought a couple of posts that showed my girl's lively defiant streak, but also my own rigidness that can sometimes unnecessarily wound her ego.

Entering my favorite part of the year, my mood always takes on an extra spark with the first crisp scents of Autumn. My favorite post from the month of October described the rather sadistic predicament i placed my girl in during one of our Friday sessions. And apparently, the fall makes her friskier too, as she pushed several limits with me in a rather public place. Little brat.

Seeing as i'm in a longterm relationship, part of my ruminating energy gets focused on what makes a strong one, which is critical for anything that will last, but especially for a healthy power exchange. I explored my view of coupling as if tending to a garden in a November post. The presence and strength of words are evident throughout my site, but especially so in this entry that examined how one can be made submissive simply by restricting and molding their vocabulary. In an attempt to pick my reader's brains, i tried to start a discussion on whether or not Tops "hunt" their bottoms, and whether or not a bottom could ever play the role of a hunter themselves.

I ended the year 2008 with the deep honor of sharing the words and perspective of the lovely Vesta. I'm so grateful she took to the task i first laid before her a few months ago. I needed the break, but i also felt the readers would relish in her authorship.

Overall, it's been a very exasperating, enlivening and eye-opening year. I've made several personal and professional achievements. One of them i'm extremely proud of is this online journal called "The Lustful Quality". Thank you for offering me the honor of your visits and words. I hope to make this forthcoming year even more filled with lustful quality.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thank you for the gift of your writings. I’ve read your contributions religiously for the last year and a half. I have also poured over your archives.

While I am fascinated and drawn to many of your interests, or at least my mind and my imagination are, some of your posts deal with topics far beyond my appetite or interest level. But even when you are discussing activities or fantasies outside my comfort zone, your skill with words and your ability to make me clearly visualize a situation I never expect or want to encounter in the reality of my life, draws me in. I have never once stopped reading one of your posts just because the particular topic didn’t speak to me. I don’t want this to sound anything but complimentary … but I would read and enjoy the writings on the back of a box of cereal if you wrote it.

Perhaps the most complimentary thing I can say is, I follow several blogs regularly, both for my work and my personal enjoyment, and yours is the first I have ever felt compelled to respond to. Something I never thought I would do. Thank you.

Your Little Slut said...

I've enjoyed reading your blog since the very moment I found it. I'm so happy that you never hit the dreaded "button." Looking forward to continuing faithful readership.

-YLS

Vesta's Submission said...

Deity:

A day or two ago I received an email from a girl who told me that after she read my first post, a door had opened in her life. I could not have been more thrilled!

Your posts must have supported so many people in their efforts to be true to themselves...many more than those who comment.

Thank you for everything.

rose said...

your posts are always fascinating, and often arousing. i enjoy your writing. don't stop.
please.

Deity said...

anon,
i'm not sure i've received a more tremendously generous comment than that before. i do not take your trepidations or lack of appetite for the specific subject matter as judgmental, and it actually means more to me that despite that lack of connection, you still enjoy and are affected by my writing.

that you chose not to sign the comment saddens me a little for i'd love to have some idea who offered me such a kind gift.

YLS,
I can easily say the same thing for your site, young lady.

I'm one for challenges, and sometimes this site has dragged mentally for me. I'll take your words into consideration the next time i get "the itch".

Vesta,
I think it's perfectly no surprise that someone would offer that to you. I've long felt your gift for the written word should be offered to more folks. That some of your writing sits on these dark walls brings me fantastic joy.

rose,
thank you, sweetheart. very nice of you. i'll do my best to keep at it. thank you for your encouragement.