Tuesday, November 6, 2007


When our schedules allow, we meet once a month, usually over a meal like two predators. On the surface, our appearance assumes that of two urban men who have commuted back to their neighborhood from work and are now relaxing by patronizing a local eatery. We do not have bags containing coils of rope, a collection of shackles, clamps or gags sitting at our feet, nor are there whips hanging from our belts. To look at us, you would never guess that our sexual proclivities involved the sado-masochistic actions we project onto our female partners nor that these activities made up the bulk of our discussions when we commune monthly. Luckily, our waitresses have not been in range to hear such words as "knifeplay", "breath control", "Shibari", or "nooses" to arouse suspicion.

I lose track of time when i meet with my dominant friend K. We could've just sat down, and in a flash, we will have digested three hours. One explanation for this comes from how engrossing our discussions tend to be. I have a limited number of people in my life i can stretch out a palaver over the issues arising in a power exchange. From our first conversation, i felt like i was swimming in an endless stream of water. On occasion, i needed to stick my head above the surface to breathe, otherwise, i was practicing a new form of respiration - fully submerged - one that i had not had the opportunity to try before. Most of my vanilla friends have no clue as to my sexuality, and those that do, treat it like something they'd wished never to gain more than the small inkling they possess. This has led me to filling up hundreds of notebooks with stories, fantasies, doubts, questions and one-sided dialogues in order to express the deep-seeded wellings of my psychology. With K, i not only gain the opportunity to receive experience-derived feedback, but i learn about an entirely different experience and approach to SM. And yet, there is much common ground between us, which makes our dialogue even more fulfilling.

We've recently turned our discussion to negotiating an evening of us together with our partners. I proposed the idea to K first, and him being the AMAZING sport that he is, accepted the offer. Since my girl reads this journal from time to time, i won't go into detail about what K and i have decided upon (i won't even apply the "my girl" label as i know she insists on reading those posts specifically). The negotiations themselves have been a learning process for me, bringing up all sorts of questions and uncertainties that i hadn't expected. Luckily, K has been more than forthcoming in letting me express these and respond with sincerity and understanding.

I suspect the girls (who also meet together, on their own) do not look upon these gatherings of two tops as being completely beneficial to their well-being. It's sort of tantamount to two super-powers gathering for a summit and exchanging methods (i.e. pillaging, plundering, raping) they use to carve up little nations in order to exploit their natural resources. But as K i'm sure would assert, we come in peace.


Sub Nouveau said...

I must say I'd love to eavesdrop on your conversation. I'd love to have a sub friend to meet with on occasion. I can talk sex with my vanilla friends, but I'd love to have some girl talk about bruises & stuff.
as always an interested post.

Laani said...

With my 'nilla friends it's either cringe or shock.

littlegirl said...

personally, i love the idea of dominant men sitting around talking about the most effective ways to use their submissives. it gives me all-out tingling shivers.

Mac said...

Well, my friend, I would hazard to guess that there may be some diplomatic kvetching about the “coming in peace” bit (since I usually come armed to the teeth), but that tranquility is what seems to reliably ensue from our respective (and soon to be collective) campaigns, about this there would appear to be universal entente.

While I can't help but appreciate the bold-faced encomium of my confederacy to your immoderate schemes, it must be said that my ready alliance has for a long time been practically guaranteed by our common world-view, especially as regards La Femme √Čternel. It’s easy to go along with plans to work-over our women-folk that I might have suggested myself.

You always were the quicker one. ;)

oatmeal girl said...

to follow up on littlegirl's comment - even more shiver-inducing would be to sit there listening, silent, hearing them debate plans for me and the other sub, weighing the effects of different implements of pain, the comparative merits of rope vs chain, hemp vs cotton, clothespins vs nipple clamps...

Deity said...

makes me wonder if indeed some of our waitresses aren't overhearing us, and are just politely demuring. i like that idea.
i recommend at least one good kinky friend. they keep you (in)sane.

such micey people!

i'm not sure we discuss the most effective ways, but ways that we certainly want to use them. we just assume they'll go along for the ride.

you'll scare the readers, my good man. Armed to the teeth...

i assure the readers that he's quite harmless (i can't assure any of you that this previous statement is true).

in public? sitting at a nearby table? same table? bound in anyway? always varying degrees of pain with you, darlin.

oatmeal girl said...

the tables are small. so we, the girls, sit at the next table. not bound physically. but bound by the order to remain silent and still while we hear ourselves discussed in a way that clearly indicates our own fears and desires have no bearing whatsoever on the project.