Sunday, April 15, 2007
Working back to the Big Bang
I was never drawn to the shy, meek female. The ones that grabbed my attention were the most popular girls who had a loyal following despite their unhindered bitchiness. And if it wasn't the icy cheerleader, it was the exceedingly independent "dark" girl who was writing on her tattered jeans words like "death" and "destroy".
Now, i start this tabloid about my sexual journey somewhere in the mid-point. The cheerleader and dark girl were only characters i encountered once i started Junior High school. At some point i plan on expanding in all directions from this period of my life (the direction dictated by my and any of my readers' interest). This will serve to illustrate what i believe is the overall anatomy of a man who has grown comfortable with the fact that he enjoys the struggles of a beautiful female (muffled or not), put in a predicament of his choosing.
At the time when my social clique dictated that i stick to the Honor Roll and Speech and Drama club for my teenage romances, i couldn't help but wander to the section of the hallway where the cheerleaders bubbly and viciously convened and the South wall of the rec yard where the dark girls poured over their notebooks filled with poisonous odes. I would linger, take a position that would not expose my observational purpose, and just watch. Occasionally, i'd get called out, by someone who (usually of the opposite sex) noticed i was not with "my flock", but most times, be left alone.
The chapters of my early teenage exploration of the female species consisted of short periods of bored "dating" with nice enough girls who broke the bell curve on tests. But most of it happily resided in this realm of observance of the bitches and the darks. Once my freshman year of high school came around, i had found myself in a few relationships with girls from these two groups.
What surprised me was a universal reality i came to discover about these girls. It wasn't a universal quality they all shared, but my uniform reaction once we started dating.
I wanted to transform every single one of them.